No. It’s just me…

Can I have it all, alone?

Good morning, sometimes when you’re happy you’ll start to remember the times when you weren’t and try to figure out what went wrong. It’s a blessing to be able to acknowledge where you were and be happy about where you are, on the outside….but

Knowing and listening to you is vital information for your everyday life. I remember when I was young and I would always listen to adults say enjoy being a child, enjoy not knowing and I yearned to know what that meant. The meaning is still a long sentence yet to have punctuation, something that is just everlasting. No Mary J Blige cd or health education class could prepare me for some to most of the pain I’d bore as an adult. Realizing that everyone lives their own individual life is surprising, relieving and scary all at once. You go through so much day to day struggle while trying to maintain mental stability and battle internal demons that no one knows of. Why am I alone and where is the help I need to rid me of these personal hardships? There is no help and the reality is that god provides you with all the strength you’ll ever need, right? If religion is something that is supposed to keep me on track, why is my train derailed majority of the time? Majority of the time we can be surrounded by parades of people and feel extremely alone with the longing for personal fulfillment. Whether feeling uncomfortable about going to dinner alone or feeling trapped when every box on the application you check says single. There’s always a personal void that needs filling and requires the adaptation of a plus-something. I almost everyday walk around with a helpful smile while internally frowning and feeling like something is missing. That’s not an easing feeling when you wake up alone, go to bed alone, stress alone, smile alone, is that what life is all about? We question ourselves when people say we shouldn’t worry we should just live and enjoy the gift of breathing but how can I when my mind just won’t stop running? There just simply isn’t enough time in the day, where is my 25/8?

9 thoughts on “No. It’s just me…

  1. This is a great read. it helps make u focus on the positive things going on in your life daily, instead of dwelling on the negative.

  2. I remember being single and feeling like. I have a salon,car,home,however I was alone.I realize now I was learning to luv myself first. And going thru that period was growth n healthy for me. God feels voids thst no human being can. I gain self worth,peace,luv n happiness.Learning what n who I am .

  3. And that’s the most important thing about living and that’s self love and self preservation and everything else will come, its easy to say but takes the journey to know

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s